My Heart Leaps Up
My heart leaps up when I behold
A Rainbow in the sky:
So was it when my life began;
So is it now I am a man;
So be it when I shall grow old,
Or let me die!
The Child is father of the man;
And I wish my days to be
Bound each to each by natural piety.
I love this poem and it encapsulates how i'm feeling today: joy at being alive and having the responsibility of creating the next generation!
Sunday, 27 June 2010
Saturday, 26 June 2010
The Relaxation Response
As mothers we have our work cut out for us every hour of every day. At the moment life for me is frustrating to say the least. As i write my one year old is rubbing the lovely sauce that i made for dinner all over her head, and now tipping the plate upside down; in a moment she will get bored of eating and scream as if the universe was coming to an end.
Some days i see the funny side. Some days i just want to cry. Some days i embrace my situation with gratitude for the wonderful gift of life, and cry anyway. Whatever i manage i always try my best; there's no point striving for perfection.
Luckily for me life seems to throw up the right stuff just when i need it. I trust that it will and it does. Recently this came in the form of a cd: 3 Easy Steps to Deep Relaxation by Dr Swami Shankardev Saraswati. It now has a permanent home on my ipod and i listen to it as often as possible.
I have to say that the benefits of acquiring this cd have been magnanimous. I think prior to owning it i spend the last 15 or so years living with my sympathetic nervous system constantly switched on. I was always tense, anxious or worried and felt trapped in a vicious circle of negative thinking. I tried everything to change but change didn't come.
What Dr Shankardev teaches is the biology behind relaxation plus three techniques to achieve deeply relaxing states. By practicing these techniques your body learns to activate the para-sympathetic nervous system which lets our body experience relaxation. More and more i am finding that i can keep my cool even when i am being pushed in another direction e.g. like today when my toddler decided to put the hand-held fan in her potty and switch it on! Normally this would elicit loud words of dissatisfaction but today mummy was cool.
Now i won't say that this has made me a model mother but it has definitely helped me to bring about positive change and this had made my (and my childrens) life a whole lot more enjoyable.
I wonder why my doctor couldn't have recommended me this cd rather than the script for anti-depressants!
Some days i see the funny side. Some days i just want to cry. Some days i embrace my situation with gratitude for the wonderful gift of life, and cry anyway. Whatever i manage i always try my best; there's no point striving for perfection.
Luckily for me life seems to throw up the right stuff just when i need it. I trust that it will and it does. Recently this came in the form of a cd: 3 Easy Steps to Deep Relaxation by Dr Swami Shankardev Saraswati. It now has a permanent home on my ipod and i listen to it as often as possible.
I have to say that the benefits of acquiring this cd have been magnanimous. I think prior to owning it i spend the last 15 or so years living with my sympathetic nervous system constantly switched on. I was always tense, anxious or worried and felt trapped in a vicious circle of negative thinking. I tried everything to change but change didn't come.
What Dr Shankardev teaches is the biology behind relaxation plus three techniques to achieve deeply relaxing states. By practicing these techniques your body learns to activate the para-sympathetic nervous system which lets our body experience relaxation. More and more i am finding that i can keep my cool even when i am being pushed in another direction e.g. like today when my toddler decided to put the hand-held fan in her potty and switch it on! Normally this would elicit loud words of dissatisfaction but today mummy was cool.
Now i won't say that this has made me a model mother but it has definitely helped me to bring about positive change and this had made my (and my childrens) life a whole lot more enjoyable.
I wonder why my doctor couldn't have recommended me this cd rather than the script for anti-depressants!
Thursday, 24 June 2010
Ten things
1. TRUST - Trust that things will always work out for the best.
2. CHERISH your friends and loved ones.
3. Don't be afraid of FEAR - if you find yourself afraid, confront your fears head on and find the depths of love for them. It's ok to be afraid.
4. If someone needs HELP, help them whoever and where ever they are.
5. LISTEN carefully to your heart. When it feels full and open you are on the right path.
6. Be TRUE to yourself. Stick up for what you believe.
7. Have FAITH. Without it you have nothing.
8. Be POSITIVE: what ever attitude you put out you will get back.
9. Believe in LOVE. It really does make the world go round.
10. Follow your true PASSION. It is your only route to true happiness.
2. CHERISH your friends and loved ones.
3. Don't be afraid of FEAR - if you find yourself afraid, confront your fears head on and find the depths of love for them. It's ok to be afraid.
4. If someone needs HELP, help them whoever and where ever they are.
5. LISTEN carefully to your heart. When it feels full and open you are on the right path.
6. Be TRUE to yourself. Stick up for what you believe.
7. Have FAITH. Without it you have nothing.
8. Be POSITIVE: what ever attitude you put out you will get back.
9. Believe in LOVE. It really does make the world go round.
10. Follow your true PASSION. It is your only route to true happiness.
Wednesday, 16 June 2010
Perception Obsession
Housework. Grrrr. I have spent the last god knows how many years trying to keep on top of the housework. Having a clean and neat house gives me a sense of control and helps me feel like i'm coping. I know many parents feel like this but i've realised recently that this feeling is more than a little misleading.
Simone de Beauvoir has written extensively about womans role in "The Second Sex" and in other stories. I remember one of her characters who's life was a constant battle with the housework and children, and this was the way i was beginning to feel. You get up in the morning and put washing on, feed the children breakfast, do the dishes, make lunch etc etc and you can fall into the trap of feeling like this is all your life amounts too. You can centre your perception on this struggle and get lost in it, and lose your self in it. Your blinkers are put on and you don't see anything else anymore. Life is no longer fun ;(.
What i've realised is it doesn't have to be this way. I woke up this morning and while i was in the bath i realised that my girls were happy today because i didn't get up and see the mess; i got up and we pulled out a train set and played. I had my bath and i didn't see that the bath did in fact need cleaning; i saw that it was a great day for a walk.
What I realised, is that your outside world is a reflection of your perception and all the little seemingly insignificant thoughts that make up your perception, and that your perception is something you can change for the better.
Don't let your perception become trapped in a cycle of something that you will never keep on top of. Keep your mind focused on what is good in life, and life will be good. Good luck!
Simone de Beauvoir has written extensively about womans role in "The Second Sex" and in other stories. I remember one of her characters who's life was a constant battle with the housework and children, and this was the way i was beginning to feel. You get up in the morning and put washing on, feed the children breakfast, do the dishes, make lunch etc etc and you can fall into the trap of feeling like this is all your life amounts too. You can centre your perception on this struggle and get lost in it, and lose your self in it. Your blinkers are put on and you don't see anything else anymore. Life is no longer fun ;(.
What i've realised is it doesn't have to be this way. I woke up this morning and while i was in the bath i realised that my girls were happy today because i didn't get up and see the mess; i got up and we pulled out a train set and played. I had my bath and i didn't see that the bath did in fact need cleaning; i saw that it was a great day for a walk.
What I realised, is that your outside world is a reflection of your perception and all the little seemingly insignificant thoughts that make up your perception, and that your perception is something you can change for the better.
Don't let your perception become trapped in a cycle of something that you will never keep on top of. Keep your mind focused on what is good in life, and life will be good. Good luck!
Wednesday, 9 June 2010
A Question to you!
Where is your consciousness centered? Is it in your head? Do you think logically, or tend to over-think and analyse?
Today i have learned that i can choose where i 'think', 'feel' or 'intuit' from. My consciousness now is centered in my heart, and now i know that this is the right way for me to continue my life, with love and compassion.
La vie est belle
Elle xxx
Today i have learned that i can choose where i 'think', 'feel' or 'intuit' from. My consciousness now is centered in my heart, and now i know that this is the right way for me to continue my life, with love and compassion.
La vie est belle
Elle xxx
Saturday, 22 May 2010
A BIT ABOUT ME AND WHY I’M BLOGGING
Hi, I’m new to blogging so please excuse any mistakes, typos or general ignorance on my part, offending people is not my intention. I’ve decided to start my own blog as I’ve always felt that writing is really important, but until now I’ve never had anything important enough to write about. Now I find myself the wrong side of 30 I’m thinking that if I don’t start now it may never happen.
Writing is a funny thing. Because I’m new to this form of self-expression called blogging, I feel almost blind to what type of impression I’m going to create, or what I’m going to create at all. I guess I hope that this will be an experiment on my part to see what ‘I’ look like on a page and what I can achieve and learn through the process of writing and sharing.
I also see writing as a key figure in the process of self-development: a space to create and discover who I really am and what I want in life. Like a lot of people, what I’d like is to find is a direction that will lead me to peace and happiness, and when I find it I can pass the knowledge on to my children. I believe that each of us has something that we are truly passionate about and that following our hearts will lead us to exactly this. The hard bit for me is weeding through all the things that interest me and deciding on which is my true passion, and then wondering how on earth I can make a career out of it.
At this point in my life I feel that I’ve managed to narrow down my choices and come to some tentative conclusions: that I love discovering new knowledge and information and sharing this with others - some times without the person in question actually being interested. That writing is my best bet as far as communication goes, and that what I really want is to someday publish something - or lots of things - worth reading. My most important discovery to date is the subject of my proposed writings and the things that i'm most passionate about, these being philosophical questions about the nature of the mind, the nature of reality and the role that language plays in both the mind and reality. Quite a broad category but i won't go into detail here about the many exact subjects as it may take a while!
I realise that this blog won’t be everyone’s cup of tea so to speak, but I really hope that it will speak to a smaller and maybe more select audience. What I really really hope now is that if you have enjoyed reading that you will feel inspired enough to leave a comment to tell me what you did or didn’t like, or your thoughts on the subjects, or just a general comment that has something vaguely to do with anything. I’d love to hear from you. Thank you so much xxx
Writing is a funny thing. Because I’m new to this form of self-expression called blogging, I feel almost blind to what type of impression I’m going to create, or what I’m going to create at all. I guess I hope that this will be an experiment on my part to see what ‘I’ look like on a page and what I can achieve and learn through the process of writing and sharing.
I also see writing as a key figure in the process of self-development: a space to create and discover who I really am and what I want in life. Like a lot of people, what I’d like is to find is a direction that will lead me to peace and happiness, and when I find it I can pass the knowledge on to my children. I believe that each of us has something that we are truly passionate about and that following our hearts will lead us to exactly this. The hard bit for me is weeding through all the things that interest me and deciding on which is my true passion, and then wondering how on earth I can make a career out of it.
At this point in my life I feel that I’ve managed to narrow down my choices and come to some tentative conclusions: that I love discovering new knowledge and information and sharing this with others - some times without the person in question actually being interested. That writing is my best bet as far as communication goes, and that what I really want is to someday publish something - or lots of things - worth reading. My most important discovery to date is the subject of my proposed writings and the things that i'm most passionate about, these being philosophical questions about the nature of the mind, the nature of reality and the role that language plays in both the mind and reality. Quite a broad category but i won't go into detail here about the many exact subjects as it may take a while!
I realise that this blog won’t be everyone’s cup of tea so to speak, but I really hope that it will speak to a smaller and maybe more select audience. What I really really hope now is that if you have enjoyed reading that you will feel inspired enough to leave a comment to tell me what you did or didn’t like, or your thoughts on the subjects, or just a general comment that has something vaguely to do with anything. I’d love to hear from you. Thank you so much xxx
MOTHER EARTH
I don’t know about you but sometimes I display behaviour that is less than desirable for my children to be witnessing. Things that I really don’t want my children to copy, i.e. shouting, screaming, throwing things, crying, criticising, and generally just not being in the mood. I try to keep this to a minimum but self control was never a strong point for me.
Some days I wish that my little angles would fly away and leave me alone for just 1 minute. I feel like I’m last in line for everything: eating, bathing, sleeping and other really essential things and it really pisses me off. And on top of this I then feel miserable and sorry for myself.
This is not a good way to live, or to feel and I needed to snap out of it or I’d be in danger of falling back into depression. Luckily, about a week ago I was reading a beautifully illustrated book that a friend bought me about chakra healing, not a subject that I would have previously chosen but I’ve found it really useful. The book is called Chakra Healing by Liz Simpson and although it’s not directly about parenting a lot of what’s covered can be of help stressed and over-burdened mothers. What I found poignant on this occasion is the distinction it made between two archetypes: the victim and the earth mother.
The victim was described someone who lets themselves become vunerable, needy and ungrounded and the earth mother is more positively associated with nourishment, caring and unconditional love; an earth mother is strong enough to act with love and to effect positive change. So now when I get frustrated or angry I somehow manage to intercept and consciously switch to earth mother mode, replying to screaming demands for milk and chocolate cake with a kind and rational voice: it seems to be working. Now I feel like I have more time, which means more time to cuddle when they feel sad or lonely in the night; more time to play even if I’m knee deep in housework; and more time just to say I love you when I know that I’ve only got 5 minutes to concoct and cook dinner before man gets home.
This new approach really paid off today. Not only did people comment on how polite Gwen was being, there was even no tantrum on leaving playgroup, and indeed less tantrums in general. Both my girls seem more content and more like little earth mothers themselves, and that makes me and everyone else a little bit happier.
Some days I wish that my little angles would fly away and leave me alone for just 1 minute. I feel like I’m last in line for everything: eating, bathing, sleeping and other really essential things and it really pisses me off. And on top of this I then feel miserable and sorry for myself.
This is not a good way to live, or to feel and I needed to snap out of it or I’d be in danger of falling back into depression. Luckily, about a week ago I was reading a beautifully illustrated book that a friend bought me about chakra healing, not a subject that I would have previously chosen but I’ve found it really useful. The book is called Chakra Healing by Liz Simpson and although it’s not directly about parenting a lot of what’s covered can be of help stressed and over-burdened mothers. What I found poignant on this occasion is the distinction it made between two archetypes: the victim and the earth mother.
The victim was described someone who lets themselves become vunerable, needy and ungrounded and the earth mother is more positively associated with nourishment, caring and unconditional love; an earth mother is strong enough to act with love and to effect positive change. So now when I get frustrated or angry I somehow manage to intercept and consciously switch to earth mother mode, replying to screaming demands for milk and chocolate cake with a kind and rational voice: it seems to be working. Now I feel like I have more time, which means more time to cuddle when they feel sad or lonely in the night; more time to play even if I’m knee deep in housework; and more time just to say I love you when I know that I’ve only got 5 minutes to concoct and cook dinner before man gets home.
This new approach really paid off today. Not only did people comment on how polite Gwen was being, there was even no tantrum on leaving playgroup, and indeed less tantrums in general. Both my girls seem more content and more like little earth mothers themselves, and that makes me and everyone else a little bit happier.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)